Monday, August 18, 2008

Pleasant Surprise

Today sucked really bad. I was at the funeral home from 3 until 8 and it was not fun...not that these things ever are. Funeral tomorrow...and its going to break me. I've held up really well. I cried when she passed away and then a few small times here and there and then another big cry today when we first got there. But other than that I've been a pretty good rock. But tomorrow I'm going to be a puddle.

Even though today wasn't much fun there were a few good moments in there. (I guess as good as something can get in that situation) Some family came up from Kentucky and I was very excited to see them. We don't get to visit much. One of the people who came up is a couple years older than my mom and he is an absolute riot. He is a lot of fun to be around and that really helped lighten the mood. (Won't use his name so I'll just call him R) A couple weeks ago, before all this started, what he did today would have made my day. It still made me really happy but nothing was going to really cheer me up all that much.

Anyway R is a Social Worker (which I was totally unaware of) and he found out from someone else in the family that I was going into that. So he came over and started talking to me and was really excited about my decision. He was telling me about some things that he had done and was encouraging me. I was amazed. I guess its a Social Worker thing because most of the support I get is from people who are Social Workers (and actually understand it). I was really excited and it cheered me up some to finally get some real support from someone in the family. I need to make it a point to talk to R more often! I know to some people this may seem like a dumb thing to be excited about, but when just about everyone shoots it down its nice to finally get some support.

I guess that's all I have. I need to get to bed because I have to be up early tomorrow for the funeral. Dang.

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