Do you know what I hate?
Getting out of bed.
Do you know why?
People piss me off.
I can't enjoy a full day. I usually can't enjoy half a day. Someone is always in a pissy mood. Which isn't good because it takes one smartass remark to get me fired up. Sometimes it doesn't even take a remark, just their general behavior if they are in a bad mood. I've always had anger problems, but this is damn ridiculous. My guess is my house.
In my house its all about being on the defense. Always. Someone is always fighting with at least one other person and you have to be ready to be dragged into it somehow. If you aren't pulled into that fight, you will find yourself in a different one. I hate waking up because I hate leaving my room to see whats going to happen. Who will yell at me for something I can't control? Who will tell me I'm a dumbass today? Who will say its my fault that they are in a fight with someone else? Who will complain to me about someone else in the house and get me pulled into the middle?
I can't wait to move out. Living here is going to end up holding me back. Everything is unproductive and negative. I can't stand it. I'm not a negative person but because of all the stupid shit I have to put up with I am becoming less and less optimistic and more angry all the time. I hate it.
Fuck this.
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